On the Hazards of Barfing A Lot

Yesterday I was getting ready for work and Bonnie was crawling around in the Kitchen. I had my back to her when I heard a loud thump. It was the unmistakable sound of her little (well, big) pumpkin head hitting the floor. Sure enough, after a momentary silence the "Weeeeeeehhhhhhhhh" was resonating throughout our cozy little home. When I picked her up, it became apparent that in her travels across the kitchen floor she had barfed, attempted to crawl through the puddle, and slipped. Too bad baby barf doesn't work as floor wax. If it did I would have the shiniest kitchen floor around, and I'd still have plenty left over to bottle and sell.

This incident has gotten me thinking about the challenges and hazards that come with barfing all the time. They include:

• Slipping and falling in your own barf
• Spots and stains on clothing and floors
• Waking up with barf in your hair
• Just when you get nice and comfy in mom's arms and have a nice barf, mom puts you down and starts mumbling things under her breath.
• Friends that don't want to get too close for fear of getting barfed on
• The assurance that as soon as you put on a clean pair of socks - you'll step in a puddle of barf that you didn't know was there.
• Dogs that lick you constantly because you taste like barf
• Always wearing damp clothing - possibly reducing one's resistance to disease